The other night (actually it was the wee hours of the morning) I added a plot twist to chapter 13 of my 2nd draft. It felt good to throw my characters a curveball and imagine how they might react. We’re all living in a plot twist right now and we’re all facing our own reactions to that.
I live in a small town but I’m not far away from the mighty Mayo Clinic of Minnesota. The virus is here. And since I’ve only been practicing my social distancing for about 1 week I need to stay in for 1 more week before I could develop my own symptoms if I contracted the virus. However, since my husband is still going to work and seeing a handful of people he still carries more of a risk (not to mention his grocery haul from earlier this week).
I tend to react emotionally to things. I feel the weight of the burdens around me very easily. I can imagine myself in all the worst case scenarios and it really throws my mood into a mud pile. I worry about my loved ones, especially the older ones and the more vulnerable ones. That said, I am very okay with shutting myself in during this if it means it helps reduce patients and save lives. But we miss people. We miss feeling carefree. And right now we don’t know when the light at the end of the tunnel will appear.
I’ve experienced all the emotions: fear, anger, sadness, loneliness, anxiety, depression, overwhelm etc… and it fluctuates easily.
In just the last few days what I have found to be helpful is: GET OFF THE INTERNET. The more I read or hear about the news the less hopeful and more anxious I feel. I am constantly distracted and am not pouring myself out to my kids who I am home with all the time. GET OUTSIDE. That’s been hard when it is cold and rainy or snowy. I’ve been praying for good weather or just opportunities to get out even if it’s short or a drive through the countryside. WRITE. Giving my characters a plot twist in a high intensity chapter was oddly satisfying. As an author of a fiction book I at least have some control over what goes on in my made up story. It’s a roundabout way of coping with real life.
When it comes down to it though what I am praying for is revival. I want to see God grow the church (the global church!) when people can’t go to church. Oh the irony! What if that’s His plan all along? I also want revival in my own heart. I want to have a bolder faith, a fearless faith, a hope-filled faith. My constant battle with anxiety is to change my thinking from ‘what-if’ to ‘even-if’. From there, if I can take those ‘even-if’ phrases and put them out of my mind, trusting that God will supply my every need WHEN I need it and I can live in the moment of every day. Right now my days are focused on my kids, our home, and each other. If that ever changes I trust that God will get me through whatever will happen next.
I hope you can utilize this time to dig into the word more (as I hope to do). I invite you to livestream a church service (or a few, hey why not!?) and open your heart to the Lord. Let Him guide you and speak to your heart. Maybe He’s got a plan for you in this. Maybe He will reveal Himself to you and the saving power of Jesus’ death on the cross and you will no longer have anything to fear.
In other news…about my novel. This whole pandemic has been terribly distracting. However, the fact that I’ve been distracted has motivated me to hunker down and get more writing done. This is why I spent 10:30-2am writing the other day… yikes. I’ve got a 2nd draft to finish and I am ITCHING for Beta reader feedback!!! I think I’m about 70% through my 2nd draft. I would like to go through and polish a little with one more round of big picture edits. THEN…the betas!
I started an email newsletter! So…if you follow me here on this blog (which I write in very sporadically it seems) but you definitely want to know how the progress of my book is coming, OR if you are interested in possibly being a beta reader for me soon I would love to have you sign up for my newsletter. I will be writing my very first one soon! I will be sending out monthly updates where I talk about the writing process, my progress, anything exciting coming up, or anything strictly literary related. I promise to keep it fun, light-hearted, and brief.
To sign up for my writing newsletter visit this page.
In all of this COVID craziness I’m thankful to have writing as an outlet.
If I may, let me share a couple of resources that I have found incredibly helpful during this time:
Living on the Edge – March 20th broadcast
5 Things to Remember When Coronavirus Cancels Your Life – incredible article chalk full of amazing C.S. Lewis and Tolkien quotes.
MEGA list of online resources for parents – by our own City Moms Blog.
Praying blessings over you today! Thanks to all the healthcare workers, delivery workers, grocery workers, teachers, legislatures, scientists, pastors and more who are working above and beyond what is typical.